Beta Tells

being a beta male


“An alpha is a guy who women find sexually attractive and want to fuck. A beta is a guy women find useful who might offer a buck”

Tom Torero


People like to over complicate what is “alpha” and “beta” but evolutionary biology is crystal clear on this. Alphas have the power and frame. Women desire them sexually for their DNA legacy. Betas concede the power and frame, and women see them as asexual friends or men who can offer them provisions.

Women swoon for alphas and negotiate with betas. The former gets wild passionate sex for free. The latter gets strung along as her gay best friend or cash machine. If this concept is new to you then read my Secret Society series of 30 blog posts, starting here.

Guys confuse “alpha” for money, muscle mass, and model looks. I go through this common misunderstanding here:


Anyway, back to the betas. What are some classic beta tells to be aware of?

  • they are friends with girls or provider partnersĀ 
  • they agree with everything a girl says
  • they hide their dicks
  • they help girls with their problems
  • they give financial support to girls
  • they pedestalise girls and worship their beauty
  • they have a big “Madonna vs Whore” complex
  • they’re emotional and reactive
  • they’re apologetic
  • they’re constantly approval seekingĀ 
  • they’re egalitarian and idealistic (ignoring biology)


Of course there’s also fashion (safe, beige, comfortable), body language (leaning in, supplicating), voice (weak, effeminate, uptalk) and so on, but those are all just outward manifestations of an inner problem. A lack of frame.

Want to make the switch from beta to alpha? My textbook Street Hustle goes through my complete A-Z toolkit for seducing girls as the lover rather than the provider.

6 thoughts on “Beta Tells”

  1. so the traditional men who think women are equal to men, are fundamentally beta in essence? Even though they may convince themselves they can control situation with their long term partner.

  2. OK, so you’re defining alpha and beta from a behavioral perspective. This is fine.

    However, I take issue with your claim that “daygame makes you alpha” in the video. In fact, I believe it to be the exact opposite.

    What does it say about our values as males that we must run after women on the street to get their attention?

    Alphas, especially situational alphas, have women coming to them.

  3. Pancake Mouse sounds like one of those game denialist “be yourself” types that you talk about on the “Field Of Dreams” video. Do such guys really believe it or are they just bitter about not being able to cold approach themselves?

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