Torero Texting Guide


Here it is – the much requested Daygame Dynamo video on texting. I go through the top ten mistakes that guys make when texting a girl they want to get out on a date. These also apply to apps like Facebook Messenger and WhatsApp. See which ones you’re making.

To counteract these mistakes, allow me to present to you the following…

Tom Torero’s Texting Rules:

  1. Avoid boring questions 
  2. Use pings (flirty statement + question) instead
  3. Don’t answer all her questions logically
  4. Write 1/3 less than she does
  5. Take 1/3 longer to reply than she does
  6. Seem 1/3 less keen than she is
  7. No kisses, smileys or exclamations
  8. Don’t chase dead leads
  9. Get her out, don’t be a text buddy
  10. Date request strongly – tell, don’t ask 


If you want more of the basics on the Torero Text Model then go back to this video from a few years ago:


Collecting lots of phone numbers but they’re flaking? Watch this:

21 thoughts on “Torero Texting Guide”

  1. That sounds nice.
    I know some guys who are good at pick ups. Sometimes rich girls pay lots of money for them like going on vacation together and paying their airplane ticket,hotel,…
    Have you ever accepted these kind of offers?

  2. Good video Tom.

    If there’s one thing to remember is that you can’t win points by texting. Only lose some. Her phone number purpose is only to get her out.

    Do you think James Bond would photo ping the girl between the meeting and the date ? No.

    Take the number, send her a text in the hours you met her. Then vaccuum for a day and date request. If she won’t come out the problem was during the meeting.

    1. Partially true, but that’s too black and white. For many girls you need to do a few days pinging, and good texting can win over a weak maybe girl. Be careful you’re not just filtering for “yes” girls with your strict method.

      1. Oh no don’t worry i’ve had girls come to the date and they were still maybe girls (even sometimes no girls), i just don’t think texting has any significant effect. Her coming to the date depends only on how good your Street Hustle skills are during the interaction.

        I even think sometimes that the result of the date depends 80% on how you did during the interaction and 20% on the date itself. Maybe i’m wrong but that’s what i’m noticing. Sometimes after a great date and easy kiss close but a weak first interaction on the street, it’s very hard to fuck the girl. Much harder than a weak date but a great interaction at the beginning. Did you notice something like this Tom ?

        1. @jimmy,
          Mate, when you’ve written 4 books, released countless products and hundreds of videos, then you can start to give advice..
          In the meanwhile, absorb the content and appreciate it..

    2. Not correct Jimmy. Look at the cleverness of Tom’s texting (go through his lay reports on this blog with the texts included). He’s sharp, subtle, nuanced and suggestive, able to get girls off the fence and out on a date when initial interest was low. Stealth Seduction infields testify to the fact that Tom can eventually bed the cold “no” girls on the street, even when interactions were short. Being overly rigid about your rules and theories is never a good idea Jimmy as great game is a subtle art not a military order.

    3. Maybe if we were living in the 1950’s…
      In today’s day and age there a far too many distractions for her to find something more shiny and forget about you.

  3. These are all pretty obvious mistakes… But what if she is investing very little (taking hours to respond, one word answers), there is no way you can invest even less and make it lead up to a date request. Any suggestions?

    1. If shes giving you silence or one word answers hours later. Give Value, without asking for a reply.
      Give before you receive.
      i.e. Send her a funny picture or meme.
      i.e. Tell her something interesting about your day.
      But Importantly do not ask any questions. And don’t leave hints that you want a reply.
      Just give value to get her interest.
      – Once you’ve got her interest, then you can add in a questions on top of value giving.
      – Once you got a back and forth going, then if her replies are Complimentary start making plans to see each other. (i.e. she telling you she likes xyz about you, flirting, sending you nude pictures)
      – If her back and forth is platonic and not Complimentary, move the conversation towards Complimentary.
      – If she gives you a frame test at any point, Just answer the frame test. Stop asking questions or trying to get her out.

      Yes/No Uncle Tom?

  4. I recently date requested a girl, she agreed, next day she asked if we can bring it forward an hour, I agreed, then she said actually something come up and have to cancel, to which I replied “no problem”. How should one deal with her? Was she just messing around with me?

    1. You lost the frame when you allowed the time change and when you rewarded her cancellation. If in doubt, use a “48 Hour Roll Off”….go silent on her for 2 days, then resume normal pinging.

      1. Co-sign. When a girl cancels, ALWAYS roll off (or go NC as I call it) for a couple days, then ping.

        I usually send a text back immediately as she flakes, like “ah OK”, but I may experiment with sending nothing.

  5. Tom, for point 3 “Don’t answer all her questions logically”, what ratio should we answer logically? I’m assuming a mix of 50/50 balance would be ideal? Otherwise just answering all her questions illogically would also become predictable and going into entertainer mode if we kept doing that.

  6. Hi Tom,

    What do you mean @ 1.40 with “Sucking value, taking value, not giving anything to her, not emotional excitement” ?
    How do you give value ?


  7. Tom,

    I understand how the feeler text works for girls I have already met, but what advice would you give for an opening first text to a girl I have never met before, say on a dating site such as or Eharmony?

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