“In any relationship between two people, the one who cares the least holds all the power”
Principle of Least Interest
Frame control is central to everything I teach. Is she in your frame (alpha) or are you in her frame (beta)? Who is qualifying to who? Who is more reactive? Who needs the other more?
A girl is hardwired to test a guy’s frame repeatedly to see if he’s the real deal. In pickup this is known as “shit testing.” I prefer the term “frame testing” as it better explains what is actually going on.
Frame tests are healthy and normal. It’s only beta guys who are confused and blindsided by them, wishing she’d stop as they fail them time after time. Alpha guys understand that all humans frame test each other to see who has the power. They welcome such tests as a chance to solidify their alpha position.
An experienced pickup artist will be very aware of the most common frame tests that a girl will give you during the daygame, texting and dating. More importantly, he’ll have stock responses ready to reply with which pass her tests. This is known as reframing.
So what are the ways of reframing tests from girls (or guys)? First let’s consider how to fail a frame test. Most of the questions are in fact loaded / rhetorical in nature and their purpose is to try and get you to react. Just by answering them logically means you’re justifying yourself and playing defence.
Remember the Principle Of Least Interest: the one who cares least holds all the power. Slow down, lean back, smile and don’t get reactive or defensive. Choose from one of the following two ways of passing the frame test:
Ignore. Act as if the question has never been asked. Carry on the conversation in the direction you want
Agree & Amplify. Give a clever cocky funny answer that makes a mockery out of their question
Passing her many frame tests takes practice. It’s a normal knee-jerk reaction to answer if someone asks you a question, but if you want to pass these tests then you need to get used to reframing rather than justifying.
Here are my three videos that go over the most common frame tests you’ll encounter and how to reframe them:
Daygame Frame Tests:
- I’ve got a boyfriend…
- I’m sorry but I’ve got to go…
- Do you chat up girls on the street all the time?
- How old are you?
- Why don’t you give me your number?
Texting Frame Tests:
- [She doesn’t reply to the initial message]
- [She declines your date request]
- Why don’t you come and meet my friends and I?
- Sorry, I’m going to be late…
Dating Frame Tests:
- Sorry I’m 30 minutes late…
- [She wants to take you to her bar]
- [She chooses the seats she wants in the venue]
- [She keeps the conversation in chit chat mode]
- [She rejects your kiss attempt]