The Pickup Purity Fantasy


This week’s Tom Torero Podcast explores a critical misunderstanding men have, even inside the daygame pickup community, dividing women into “angels” and “devils.”

The Purity Fantasy not only harms your Street Hustle results but also your wider world view. Below are the videos to review that I mention in the show:


The Myth Of “Good” and “Bad” Girls:


Girls As Shapeshifters:


Pedestalising Girls:

9 thoughts on “The Pickup Purity Fantasy”

  1. But Tom, I’ve had previously been in 3 years old relationship age 19-22. My girl was one of the hottest in school, and was hit on all the time. She always rejected them, and I’ve never could think that she did cheat in those 3 years. By my new knowledge it seems like it so usual that girls that go behind us guys backs?? She can’t have cheated in those years!! I don’t belive you, I’m in pain right now, she was my biggest love, and you say that I can never find a true love??? A true lovely girl that is the right one and settle down and be safe and happy. Oh God, all I wan’t to do is be safe when I find the right one… I feel hurt, neurotic, scared and somehow I still can’t accept that purity fantasy is just a fantasy… I DON’T BELIEVE IT; WON’T BELIEVE IT!!!!!

    1. If you have a strong frame over your girl, she won’t cheat on you. If you look at the guys that get cheated on, they usually do the same mistakes:

      – text her too much
      – send the first text of the day
      – gets jealous
      – stops hitting on girls
      – stop being mysterious


      1. After 2+ years in a relationship when passion has ended then cheating is very common by both the girl and guy if they’re attempting monogamy. A guy’s frame is weakened in a relationship from the start as he’s compromised his ability to walk away.

    2. If you understand frame and how it works, you’ll recognise the weakness it creates once you enter monogamy. Security and Attraction isn’t complimentary.

      1. Of course, but a mistakes you make is that relationship doesn’t mean monogamy. Keeping a strong frame means the girl will never truly know if you’re faithful or not. I’ve been in long relationships before daygame and i’ve never been faithful. It kept the girls addicted to me and I always had power over them. Even after they discovered i cheated on them they always forgave me (and i never apologized).

        1. Pretending to be monogamous and cheating on the side (i.e. the usual relationship situation) is an inefficient and convoluted strategy compared to being the lover and having lots of casual sex. If you’re interested in open relationship dynamics read Blackdragon’s excellent blog.

  2. Betas (or rather gammas) always sexually shame. They virtue signal and try to use their IQ to get revenge. White Knight anger and jealousy is toxic.

  3. Here’s a personal story about my cousin’s previous relationship and who’s a natural.

    He was seeing a girl for 3+ years. Things were going fine, up until the third year mark where his gf began to put on weight, started to nag, make less of an effort looking good and becoming more demanding of his time while he was out with friends.

    Being the alpha that he is, he called her out on this multiple times, dumping her in the process and getting her back once she demonstrated changes to her lifestyle. He dumped her the final time after attempting to manipulate him into losing his frame by accusing him of various things, which he didn’t do as a last ditched effort to snatch the frame.

    In short, what this story and personal observation taught me is that a relationship doesn’t mean the end of game. You will continue ‘frame battling’ with your gf, with her constantly trying to snatch it away from you. This usually involves arguing, fights and bickering, or what society casually calls (Normal married behaviour). This is generally typical with Western girls who insist on being the dominant ones in their relationships.

    If you’re looking for monogamy, you must learn and have frame and know how to keep it. But don’t expect an easy ride. 3 things will either occur:

    1) Keep the frame but be constantly shit-tested.
    2) Lose the frame and get dumped/cheated on.

    If you want peace of mind and like your own space, then a relationship/marriage is not recommended.

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