One of the recent new lays from my Russian daygame adventure last month stood out because of the amplified drama and tension involved. Holding the frame with straight talking is especially important in Russian seductions as this lay report shows.
I’d approached Olya in a shiny shopping mall around lunchtime early on in the trip. She was sitting down on a bench outside a store and lit up when I gave her a compliment. 22 years old, brunette, petite, I teased her about being elf-like and not having a job. She hooked and asked me to sit down next to her. Earlier in the day she’d had two interviews and was now killing time before another one in the evening.
I bounced her to a cafe upstairs in the mall for a coffee. Here began her interrogation of my backstory: Why was I in the city? For how long? What was my job? Why didn’t I speak Russian?
Rather than the usual cocky funny responses I’d give in other countries, I gave her brief enigmatic answers and then flipped things around by putting her in the interview seat: Why didn’t she have a job? Why was she single? Why had she moved to the city alone?
Russian girls respond well to direct qualification. The Mr Nice Guy polite act will get you nowhere. Especially because I was over a decade and a half older than her she lapped up the real talk and was eager to please.
The bright Autumnal sunshine beamed through the mall roof. I suggested a walk in a nearby park, trying to stretch out the instant date as long as possible to save having to go through the common pattern of Russian flaking and subsequent date rearranging. She agreed to the walk so we headed outside.
Because I was new to the area, she took the reigns and lead me around her favourite parts of the park. I could feel my frame slipping as she resumed her interrogation: Why wasn’t I married? Did I have kids? Did I approach many girls in the mall? Once again I kept my answers short and tried putting the spotlight back on her.
It was now almost two hours after approaching her and the original momentum felt like it was stalling. Perhaps I was just her way of filling more time and there wasn’t going to be a follow up date. I made the decision to cut things short before she did and said I had to get “back to my job.” At the metro we parted.
For the next few days her texting was solid. She replied quickly and would send her own images back to my photo pings. I knew she was having interviews spread out during the day and free time in between.
Our next meeting was for “English tea” at a cafe in my area. After the drink I pointed out where I lived but she was insistent that we go for a walk in the opposite direction (normal in Russia – they know what entering a guy’s apartment is code for). Another two hour walk-and-talk later I dropped her off at the metro once again.
Was this going to lead anywhere or was she a dead end? She was showing herself to be a headstrong girl who liked snatching the frame and watching what I’d do to reclaim it. I’d used more real talk with her to maintain the male-female polarity and reaffirm my Boundaries On Bullshit. Yes, I was a naughty boy. Yes, the brain between my legs was more active than the brain inside my skull. Yes, I’d be inviting her over to my place for food and a movie in the near future. She feigned shock but I could see that she loved the bluntness.
For the next few days she’d keep asking me to meet her to go for more walks, often in areas far from where I lived. I declined the requests and suggested other plans in my frame:
And there it was, the Russian bluntness on her part (“I won’t go to your house because our tea ends in sex”) and my response which didn’t back down (“I like sex”). Her reply of “I too” was the green light I needed to keep going.
After that she’d still try to get me to go on walks or meet her near her interviews but I’d still decline, leaving bigger and bigger gaps to reply. It was now an overt frame battle. She was revelling in the push-away.
Finally she cracked. She realised I wasn’t going to back down from my offer of a date at my place. A switch had flipped in her mind that she was coming over to fuck:
As icing on the cake I got her to comply further and invest by bringing me some of the Russian soup (borscht) she’d made at home.
And that was that. Over she came that evening in a tight leather skirt, black tights and heels and there was no Token LMR whatsoever. We didn’t even eat the food she’d brought. She sat on my knee as I put some music on the laptop, we made out and then I picked her up and dropped her onto the bed. The sex was the best of the whole daygame trip.
Now, I realise that the seductive dance is usually covert, not overt. It’s called the Secret Society for a good reason. However, if you want to crack the code of Russian daygame and dating then realise that blunt real talk is what gets the job done there, not pleasantries or witty banter. If you want to toughen up your frame and practise passing Shit Tests with ease then it’s a great country to game in.* Amplify the drama, embrace the tension. Hold the frame so she can relax into her femininity. Real talk indeed.
*My book “Cold Calling” goes into lots more detail about the specifics of daygame in Russia and the Former Soviet Union if you’re planning a trip.