Harem Hustle #5: Lead Retention

Part 1, 2, 3 and 4 of the Harem Hustle series so far


To keep multiple plates spinning in a non-monogamous dynamic takes skill and work. Lead retention is creating loyal customers who keep cumming back for more. You’re making them feel like they’re one in a million even though they know you’re a popular brand with lots of other devoted customers.

Sleeping with a new girl once after taking her through the sales funnel is not enough for such loyalty. You’ve got to be giving her a great customer experience (i.e. amazing sex) that she’s never experienced before, on more than one occasion.

At the same time you’ve got to be adding new fresh leads into your funnel so you’re not becoming overly concerned about any one customer. This gives you leverage and the number one mindset needed for harem hustling:


My way or the high way. I can walk out on this deal at any moment…


Without such abundance giving you this unshakeable frame, you’re going to find harem building impossible. Being overly needy, overly romantic or overly emotional about any one girl is a rocky road to the monogamy trap.

The hard balance to achieve is making sure a girl knows this but at the same time she feels like like she’s somehow special. Each customer who buys a $4.5 million Lamborghini Veneo wants to feel like they’re the most important person to the company, even though they know there are a dozen other such cars and buyers in existence.

Pre-selection is the rocket fuel needed for harem hustling. Any one of the plates you’re spinning has to feel you’re a player who’s desired by other girls, even though you’re not rubbing her nose in it. Following the Lover Rules explained yesterday is a good start for this.

Never pretend that things are monogamous. This is the number one mistake guys make when trying to build a harem. They are sleeping with a handful of girls but lying to each one about being their loyal boyfriend (or even husband). So no cuddling, romantic walks, candlelit dinners or breakfast in bed.

So what is she getting out of this non-monogamous arrangement with you? First of all (and the most important) she’s getting the best sex of her life. Naughty, dirty, raw and wild. She certainly can’t get this from her vanilla boyfriend or saggy Sugar Daddy.

Next she’s getting strong male-female polarity with you. She loves your leadership and dominance. She can relax as you’re the rock to her emotional sea.

She gets off on your zero-fucks-given approach to life. Trying to tie you down is a fantasy of hers (even though she secretly doesn’t want it). You’re her wild man: adventurous, unpredictable and untamed.

And last but not least she gets a high off the jealousy (and related drama). Even though she’ll never admit this, she loves the chase, the competition and the feeling that you’re pursued by so many women. This makes her step up her game – a feeling she can’t get with any other guy.



Read Pimp by Iceberg Slim to get a detailed account of a player who was a master of lead retention and harem building. It’s one thing sleeping with a handful of girls but getting devotion and addiction with your girls is another thing.

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This year I’ll be going into detail about my own harem hustling over the next ten months using all the tools and techniques mentioned in this series of five posts. I encourage you to get out there and start building your own funnel infield using the skills of daygame cold approach.

One thought on “Harem Hustle #5: Lead Retention”

  1. Hey Tom,
    Very welcome subject. I’m doing this atm (got two, both very much aware of the setup) and very much anticipate your in depth posts on this subject matter! Cheers from LNDN.

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