Harem Hustle #6: Preselection & Jealousy

The most common question guys have about building a harem using daygame skills is this: doesn’t each girl get jealous? 

YES. That’s the whole idea.  Preselection (“social proof”) is the bedrock of the harem hustle and what keeps the girls sticking around. If you’ve read The Mystery Method or Cialdini’s Influence then you’ll be familiar with the concept:

Social proof: We tend to have more trust in things that are popular or endorsed by people similar to ourselves – Cialdini

Girls have a hard time judging a male’s Sexual Market Value just by looking at him (unlike when men see women). They judge instead based on meta data from other females around him. If he’s preselected by other attractive women then she figures he must have market value.

Do you get jealous when you wanted to go to see your favourite musician play live in your city but the tickets sold out and all your friends got one but not you?

Do you feel like a bar is worth checking out if you see a long line of attractive people outside queuing to get in?

Do you get competitive over something when you realise it’s desired by your colleagues?

See how it works? By any one girl knowing that you’re a man with options and other girls in your life then her attraction for you goes UP. Counterintuitive to the average Mr Nice Guy but it’s key to understanding game and harem building.

So let her feel jealousy. Understand that this supercharges her attraction towards you and keeps her in your fan club. Having girls fight over you is the pinnacle of pickup.

An important caveat is how much she knows about the other girls and how you convey it. As with everything in male-female dynamics it must be implicit, not explicit. You’re hinting at preselection through carefully placed clues and behaviours, not rubbing her nose in it with an in-depth monologue or a tacky show of abundance.

In the next harem hustle post I’ll explore these implicit harem dynamics in more detail. Before then make sure you’re up to speed on how preselection works in pickup with this podcast I recorded on the subject:

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